Miss Souris

As the elevator rose swiftly to my father's office, I rehearsed nervously what I would say to him. It was never good news when he summoned us, so I was already bracing myself for the worst. The elevator sounded loudly when it reached his floor, and I took a deep breath right before the doors slid open. The malicious grins of my two sisters greeted me. I am already a few inches shorter than them, but now I felt even more inferior because of their 6 inch stilettos clacking against the marble floor as we walked together towards my father's foreboding desk, where he was seated in a chair, turned to overlook the skyline from 103 floors up.

I waited for one of my sisters to speak up, but they just grinned at me, so I cleared my throat and said as steadily as I could manage "Good morning, Mr. Roi."

He turned to us as if he had just noticed our arrival, and the three of us curtsied. He smiled warmly down on us, which baffled me. Was he not angry at us? For what I could not imagine, but it must be something, there was always something. 

"I am getting old." He said, taking us by surprise. "And soon I must retire."

"Oh no, father," my oldest sister replied. "You are in your prime, more youthful and radiant than ever." 

He chuckled softly. "You flatter me, but it is true, and I have gathered you here to decide which of you is most deserving to be the head of this fine corporation." The three of us looked at each other, all taken aback. "It will be a difficult decision, I'm sure." At that last part, I could've sworn he looked straight at me, a twinkle in his eye. What that meant I had no idea.

"To do this" he continued, "I want to know which one of you loves me most."

Immediately, my oldest sister stepped forward. "Father, I love you more than everything this company is worth. More than this whole enterprise you have built."

Not a second after she drew back did my other sister rush up to his desk, kiss my father lightly on the cheek, and say "father, I love you more than all the riches and luxuries in the whole world." 

He smiled at her, and she walked back to where my other sister and I were, scowling at me while my father couldn't see.

"And you, Souris?" He said to me. "How much do you love me?"

I froze. I knew he could be awful to us many times, but I loved him. I loved him desperately. He was my father, and he often showed it in strange ways, but I knew he loved us as well. But how to express that? How to tell him I loved him more than life itself?

"Father." I said at last. "I love you more than I love salt."

His smile melted off his face instantly, and he jumped from his seat in an uproar. "WHAT? How could you say such a thing? I raised you, nurtured you, gave you a life where anything you could ever want was a your fingertips and this is how you repay me? I loved you Souris! I loved you so much. I thought you knew that. I thought you understood that and felt the same way. You betrayed me!"

My heart beat wildly. He slammed his fist on the intercom button on his desk.

"Mr. Roi?" The secretary responded.

"Call security in here." My father said. He looked back up at me, pure hatred on his face. "You have shamed me." He whispered at me.

I had no response. I was frozen in terror.

Suddenly, four security guards rushed in, looking towards my father for instructions. He pointed a shaking finger at me. "Take her. Take her out into the country and kill her." 

My heart beat harder and harder in my chest. He couldn't possibly mean this. I'm his daughter. 

Even the security guards looked hesitant. One of them piped up and said "Sir, are you sure?"

"DO IT NOW BEFORE I HAVE YOU KILLED AS WELL!" My father spat, cutting him off.

The guard, grabbed my arm. "Come with me miss." As he and the others led me towards the elevator, I looked around panicky. What was happening? I looked to my sisters, and even they looked shocked and confused.

I was shoved unceremoniously into the elevator with the four security guards.The one who had a hold of me said "boys, when we get downstairs, you can go back to your patrol, I'll take care of this." They nodded in response, and seconds later, we arrived at the lobby. My guard led me swiftly through the foyer and out the front door to the bustling city street. Looking around, seeing the cars whiz by, the people hurry past, hearing the cacophonous sounds of the street, I couldn't help but wonder how these people could be. How could they continue their lives, rushing about to do errands, when my life had ground to a halt? 

But the guard let go of my wrist. He stepped out into the street to hail a cab, and as it came, he dug into his pocket, pulled out a wad of cash, and shoved it in my hands. "I'm so sorry for what's happened to you," he said, "but you'd do best to just lie low for a while now, ok?"

"W-wait... You're not gonna kill me?" I asked, baffled.

"What? No of course not! I don't know what you did to upset him, but you probably don't deserve it, so I'm not going to hurt you. I'm going to help you."

The taxi driver honked impatiently. "Look," the guard said "You'd better get going. Is there anything else I can get you?"

I thought briefly and then decided: "A hijab."

He looked very confused but nodded. "I'll meet you at the central fountain in the park over here at 7 tomorrow morning."

"Ok" I started to climb into the cab, but then turned around to face my rescuer. "Thank you."

He smiled and nodded, walking over to close my door for me, and I sped away.

_____________________________________________________________

14 hours later, I had donned the hijab and started to make my way for the headquarters of the company that rivals my father's, putting into motion the plan to stay disguised I had hashed out the prior evening after my banishment. It was going to be quite a trek, so I paced myself and began my walk through downtown. Sadly, just what I predicted would happen did indeed happen and I observed people veer away from me on the street, give strange looks at my headdress, or try to avoid eye contact, which to me seemed almost worse than staring. One man I passed looked at me and scoffed. Another one called from across the street, "Go back to Syria!"

It was humbling, realizing what these women had to go through on a daily basis. But I kept my head up and continued with my plan.

Finally, after over an hour, I reached the building I was looking for: a massive tower of black-tinted glass that rose into the sky, dominating the skyline in this area of downtown. Without hesitation, I forcefully pushed open the door and crossed the foyer to the secretary's desk, who looked up as I came swiftly towards her.

"Can I help you?" She asked.

"I'm here to get a job." I replied.

"Oh! That's perfect because one of our servant's just quit so we have a vacancy. Can you come back this time tomorrow for a job interview?"

So I did, and a few days and a few cheap hotels later, I got the job, and was sent upstairs to be one of the servants to the CEO. Almost immediately after meeting him, the insults started flying. Everyday when I went up to work, he had some racist comment waiting for me. I would be fetching him tea, and he'd ask "You didn't poison this, did you?" Or when I would bring him something he requested, he'd look at it skeptically and say jokingly, "I hope there's no bomb in this!"

This continued for weeks, until one day, as I was  leaning over and tying his shoes, he asked "So where do you come from?"

"A place where one doesn't toss racist comments around." I said coldly, which I could made tell him very skeptical. At that moment, some of the other servants came in giggling.

"What is the meaning of this?" My boss exclaimed.

"She left this in the break room." One of them said, pointing at me and holding up my diamond ring from my father. My eyes widened and I stood up quickly.

"Give that back," I said. "It's mine!"

"I bet she stole it!" Another one offered, and they all dissolved into giggles again.

"Bring it here." My boss said, his arm outstretched. When one of the girls put it in his palm, he turned it over in hand, examining  it. "Where did you get this?" He asked me.

I gulped. "My father gave it to me."

He looked me straight in the eyes. "You didn't steal this?"

"No."

"There is no way someone of your status could own something of this value, so you must be lying. Guards!"

I took  a deep breath and began to remove my headdress. I looked back up at him. His mouth was open. "Who are you?" He asked me amazed.

"My name is Souris Roi, daughter of Mr. Roi, and you'd do well to hand me that ring back right now."

He did so hurriedly and then thought for a second. "Why were you here?" He asked. "Were you spying on me?"

"I was doing nothing of the sort. I was merely getting a job."

"But why here? And why dressed as you were?" He stopped, thought, then said, "Is there anything I can get you, Ms. Souris?" He looked genuinely afraid. Or, not afraid, but he was definitely respectful to me all of the sudden, which was unsettling because I had received so much hate over the past few weeks. Typical.

"Actually, there is one thing you could do for me..."

_____________________________________________________________

I looked out the window, eagerly awaiting a specific car. I waited and waited and it didn't come for a long time, until I feared it would never come at all. Incredibly rich person after incredibly rich person walked past to join the gala inside. Finally, it showed up, and my father stepped out, walking up the steps.

I followed him from a distance, hoping he would turn and see me and be filled with remorse for what he did to me, but he never did. In fact, he looked completely normal. Happy even. Did he even miss me? 

I watched him walk over to the food table. This was the part where the final stage of my plan would be executed. I watched expectantly as he picked up a cracker and put it in his mouth. His eyes widened and he swallowed it almost painfully, which made me laugh. Then, he picked up a plate and began putting chicken, cheese, even a bowl of soup. This was going to be so good. I followed him to a table and watched as he sat down and began eating. When he would try something, he would look surprised and disgusted. It was incredibly amusing. He looked around wildly for something, even stopped a waiter and asked him, but, the waiter just shook his head. Chuckling to myself, I walked towards him and pulled up a chair.

"Missing something?" I asked cryptically.

He didn't even recognize me. He just blurted "None of this food is salted! I'd rather die than eat such food!"

"Well, now you say you can't live without salt," I responded coldly. "But when I said I loved you more than salt, you wanted to have me killed!"

He looked taken aback. Slowly, softly, he asked "Souris? Is that you?"

"Yes, father."

"Oh Souris! I am so sorry!" He stood up, ran to the other side of the table and hugged me. "Souris, I am so so sorry for what I've done. Oh, please forgive me!"

I looked up at him, and he did look genuinely sorry, and I loved him still, despite what he'd done. He was my father, after all.

I wrapped my arms around him and said, "I forgive you father. I love you."

Light, Darkness, and Fates in part one of Heart of Darkness

The first chapter of Joseph Conrad's novella, Heart of Darkness, describes the beginnings of Marlow's harrowing tale of his travels in Africa. The story starts with an unnamed narrator, along with a few other seamen, awaiting the departure of their ship from London, listening to Marlow's story. Marlow describes how he accepted a position as captain of a Steamboat with "The Company" and traveled to Africa to take up his command. He sees some pretty strange things while he does this, like two ominous old ladies knitting with black yarn, and a warship firing at a completely empty coast. When he finally gets to the Outer Station, Marlow witnesses slaves trying to blow up a cliff to build a railroad and then encounters, in a grove of trees, a group of sick, emaciated, dying slaves. He attempts to give food to one of them, who dies right in front of Marlow.

He stays with an accountant for a time, where he first hears of the mysterious Mr. Kurtz. When Marlow finally departs and then arrives at the Central Station, he discovers that the steamboat he was destined to command has sunk, so he is once again stuck. Awaiting repairs, he meets the extremely irritating manager of the station, who says he wishes to become a manager within the Company and also that he heard Mr. Kurtz was sick. Marlow later meets a nosy, ambitious, and mysterious brick maker (who doesn't actually make bricks), who wants Marlow to help him climb the ladder in the Company. Marlow zones out and thinks about the repairs needed for his steamboat. Soon after, a group called the Eldorado Exploring Expedition arrived, and Marlow despises the manager and his nephew.

The plot is difficult to follow at times, but it is connected by an underlying image of darkness and mystery that resurfaces periodically. For instance, the whole first scene, where Marlow is sitting on the boat before he begins his narrative, all of their surroundings are described in terms of haziness or fogginess, with everything being dim and unclear, setting up the tone and mood that will persist in the story for a while. When Marlow goes to sign for his command, he sees two old ladies "guarding the door of Darkness, knitting black wool," (Conrad, 26), and this, justifiably, freaks him out, for these old ladies are clear symbols of the Greek fates, weavers of mens' fates and, when the time comes, cutters of the threads of life for each person.

What does this dark imagery do for the story though? For one, the mystery, lack of clarity, and supposed "evilness" that the darkness represents could be employed in order to parallel the "savagery" Marlow experiences in the deep, dark, "uncivilized" Africa. On the other hand, it epitomizes the classic struggle between good and evil. Many times, there are images of darkness overcoming light, like the sun setting, but this doesn't necessarily mean Conrad is pessimistic. In fact, many times, images of light to contrast images of darkness aren't present, and instead there are only images of fog, mist, and grayness, in between light and dark, obscuring the border between the "good" and the "evil" in the story.

The Transformation That Takes Place Underwater

Chapter 18- If She Comes Up, It’s Baptism

In the Bible, baptism is a symbol of the Christian’s faith. By submerging yourself in water, and then coming back up, you are mimicking Jesus’s burial and resurrection and saying that you’ve committed to being a Christian, that you’ve been changed: you had put to death your old self and were now a new creation. Like baptism in the Bible, water carries a lot of symbolic weight in literature. Rain can be used to represent cleansing and restoration, but so can drowning. When a character goes under water but comes back up, like baptism, usually it means the character has been changed. It can also be a sign of a point-of-no-return, just like baptism was a life-long commitment.

In the Lord of the Rings, Frodo sneaks away from the indecisive Fellowship. They cannot decide what their next course of action should be, so Frodo leaves alone to continue his mission. Sam notices this and goes after Frodo, who is already leaving in a boat. Sam tries to go out to him, but he can’t swim, and he nearly drowns. Frodo dives in and saves him. When they both come up, they are changed. The have been transformed, or baptized. Frodo realizes that he was foolish to think that he could’ve gone on alone. They both understand that being out there in that boat, headed downstream means that they have made the decision to finish their mission together, and that there is no going back now. Yet they look bravely ahead and press forward; a bond forms between them.

Another example of symbolic baptism is in Divergent when the protagonist Tris is trapped inside of a glass box that is slowly filling with water. Try as she might, she cannot break the box or find any way to escape. Tris, drowning, watches as her friends stand outside observing, making no efforts to rescue her. In fact, they laugh at her and mock her. She starts to panic, but then she realizes, or remembers, that it isn’t real. She is in a simulation, a medically induced hallucination designed for her initiation into the Dauntless faction. At that moment of realization, she is able to control the simulation and break the glass box. This is a baptism of sorts because it is a turning point, both for her as a character, and for the plot. She realizes that she, unlike the other initiates is aware when she is in a simulation and has the ability to control and manipulate it. Rather than suppress this skill like everyone advises her to, she decides to use it to excel in initiation, and later, rebel. So she transforms from a shy, frightened Abnegation transfer to a strong, rebellious Divergent, all because of her moment of realization while she was drowning.

Harry Potter also has several instances of Baptism symbolism. In book 6 while helping Dumbledore retrieve a horcrux, Harry nearly drowns in a cave. He was trying to get water from an underwater lake for Dumbledore, but an undead dragged him under. Hundreds of undead swarm him, pulling him deeper, drowning him. When he resurfaces (after Dumbledore frightens them away with fire), it is Harry’s moment of realization that what they are facing is bigger than he thought, he is more important than he thought, and it really is up to him to track down the rest of the horcruxes and destroy Voldemort. This moment of realization is like a rebirth: he makes the decision to step up to the role he’s been called to, even though he is scared and doesn’t want to. This theory of baptismal symbolism is strengthened by the heavy christian parallels seen in this entire series as I talked about a little in my previous post. This article here about biblical symbolism in Harry Potter points out many of the links between Harry Potter and Jesus Christ, making it more likely that his near-death drowning experience was in fact an image of baptism. Later in book 7, when trying to retrieve the sword of Gryffindor from a frozen pond, the locket horcrux nearly strangles him. Then Ron, who had abandoned them months before, shows up, saves Harry, gets the sword from the bottom of the pond, and, after much difficulty, destroys the locket. This is a moment of change for both of them: Harry realizes how much he missed Ron and how much they needed Ron to help them. Ron realizes that they need each other, and that he was foolish for running away. They both forgive each other.

In all  of these examples, a common theme of almost drowning but being rescued, whether that be by a friend or by a realization, is present. Each time, the character experiencing the drowning, and the character who rescued this person undergo a dramatic change, just like baptism.

Frodo and Harry's Sacrifice: How Do They Resemble Christ?

Chapter 14- Yes, She’s a Christ Figure, Too

In literature, there are the classic archetypes. You have your hero, your mentor, your side-kick, your damsel in distress, etcetera. But another, often-times overlooked (by high school students at least) character that resurfaces again and again throughout literature is the Christ figure. Foster provides a list, some criteria if you will, for a character to qualify as a Christ figure. Among these are things like being in agony, sacrificing themselves, humbling themselves, and redeeming a broken world.

For me, when thinking of examples of Christ figures in literature, the first one that comes to mind is Frodo Baggins from the Lord of the Rings. Now, Frodo was not thirty-three years old; in fact, he was fifty years old when the story begins, but Foster clearly says that a Christ figure doesn’t have to fit all the criteria, just enough to where they are recognizably a symbol of Christ. Frodo also never died and rose from the grave. Well, not literally he didn’t, but he may have figuratively, as Brendan McManus M.J. says in his article discussing some of the Christian allegories found in the Lord of the Rings. After destroying the ring that was slowly destroying him, eating away at his soul, his soul is “resurrected.” He sails to Valinor, a land where he will be immortal, and lives among elves, protected from the horrors of the mainland.

At the beginning of the story when he’s in Rivendell, Frodo has to accept his fate, his duty to take the ring on a perilous journey across the continent to a place called Mordor, which scarily resembles Hell, with it’s head, Lord Sauron, scarily resembling the Devil. This ring is a great burden to Frodo, just like the weight of the cross and the sins of the world were a great burden to Christ. In the deep wilderness, Frodo is confronted by Boromir and tempted. Boromir tells Frodo how his burden will be lifted if he just gives the ring to him. He tells him that he doesn’t have to do this, just as the devil tempted Jesus in the wilderness, telling him that he could throw himself off the top of the temple and save himself, basically saying that Jesus didn’t have to die on the cross later because he was powerful enough to save himself. Yet both Frodo and Jesus knew that that was never an option. They both resisted their tempters and went on to fulfill their duty. Frodo was in considerable agony the closer he got to Mt. Doom, just as Christ was suffering on the road to Calvary and on the Cross. Frodo was tempted again once inside the mountain. When the ring was destroyed, Lord Sauron was destroyed and Middle Earth was redeemed, and Frodo departed (ascended) to Valinor (Heaven), just like when Jesus died, the world was redeemed and now  there is the promise that the Devil will be defeated when he returns.

There are many other Christ-like characters in the Lord of the Rings, like Aragorn who was the king restored to his throne, granting hope to all, as Jesus will when he returns. Also, Gandalf serves as the Fellowship’s guide, almost like a teacher leading his disciples. Also, Gandalf dies by defeating the Balrog, who could be seen as the Devil, and then later, Gandalf returns from the dead.

Foster talks about how many readers look right over all these Biblical allegories throughout literature because they are not familiar with the Bible. I think that one way readers can understand these allegories even without being aware of the Bible, is applying it to a more universal archetype: the Messiah, or Savior, which, even though that is what Jesus is, the term is not restricted to only him. Viewing Frodo as a Savior for Middle Earth might be more applicable to some than viewing him as Jesus himself.

Another very good example of a savior character, or a Christ figure is Harry Potter, but his story gets more into what happened to Christ after he was resurrected, which Foster doesn’t really talk about (but which is still a very identifying thing in Christ figures in literature). Whether JK Rowling intended her books to reflect this story or not, I have personally observed it. Harry Potter was marked for greatness with his lightning bolt scar (which I will talk more about in another entry). There were even prophecies about him. He grew up with everyone expecting him to defeat the world and destroy Voldemort (the Devil, for our purposes). Harry faced many trials along the way: loneliness, mockery, scorn, temptation, physical pain, and an impossible task that seemed like suicide, to destroy the Horcruxes. Yet he bravely persevered, even though he didn't want to. In the end, he faced Voldemort, was killed, but was miraculously resurrected. He came back for his friends and completely destroyed the enemy and Voldemort himself. This looks an awful lot like Jesus’s story: his birth was prophesied long before, his followers expected him to come with fire and hailstorms, destroying Rome, he faced many trials and sufferings: he was mocked, tempted, beaten, and brutally killed. He rose again and will come back for his followers and will destroy the enemy and the Devil.

There are so many examples that I could go on for ages, but I had to chose just some of my favorites. Others include Aslan from the Chronicles of Narnia, Superman, Spock from Star Trek, the Doctor from Doctor Who, and basically anyone that exhibits the qualities that Foster lists.

Foster explains how if a reader thinks that a character might be a Christ figure, he most likely is, because it is really the reader's opinion or perception that makes a story unique for everyone. As long as a character exhibits some Christ-like qualities and preferably sacrifices himself for a greater good, then you can go ahead and call him a Christ figure.

Talk to me (just not with your mouth full please)

Chapter 2- Nice to Eat with You: Acts of Communion

In the past, the act of eating used to be way more important than it is now, almost ritualistic. With meals taking so long and so much effort to prepare, it is no wonder that they were. Eating together as a family was a no-brainer, and it was a very important time of bonding and discussion. Today's society has gotten to the point where we can simply pop out to a fast-food restaurant and eat it on the go, or we can order pizza and it will be at our front doors in 30 minutes, with little or no effort on our parts. Because of how easily accessible  food is, we have begun to lose an appreciation for the "ceremony" of the meal. That makes it harder for us today to understand how symbolic and important eating is in literature.

In a story, when people share a meal with each other, it very often signifies that something else, something deeper is going on behind the scenes.  Foster asserts that this "something" is an act of communion, or at least a symbol of how the people in the meal relate with one another. Eating is necessary to life, and it is such a private, personal thing that it should be considered a privilege to share that experience with someone, like Robin Fox says in her anthropological analysis of food and eating.

Eating with someone is a show of trust. For instance, in The Giver by Lois Lowry, each family eats their meal with one another and it is a very important time. At the beginning of the book, there is a passage talking about one such meal: 

"Who wants to be the first tonight, for feelings?" Jonas's father asked, at the conclusion of their evening meal. 

It was one of the rituals, the evening telling of feelings... Their parents, of course, were part of the ritual; they, too, told their feelings each evening.

This demonstrates just how sacred the meal is to the characters of this book. It is a ritualistic time each day that the whole family comes together to discuss their feelings. It is a place of trust and acceptance, symbolized by the trust they must have for each other to have a meal with each other in the first place.

But it can also symbolize something negative.

In The Chronicles of Narnia, Edmund eats the turkish delight in the presence of the White Witch. This symbolizes him opening himself up to her, him trusting her. In lowering his defenses and succumbing to the temptation of the dessert, he has become vulnerable and the White Witch takes advantage of that. He trusts the Witch enough to engage in the personal act of eating in her presence. In my opinion, the act of his eating is the very moment when he has committed to betraying his siblings, even if he does not yet know it himself. If you remember that scene, the Witch looks on with a hunger, an earnest anticipation of his response, using his vulnerability as he eats to tempt him more.

In the Bible, in the original communion, the Last Supper, there is a lot going on. Even if this meal is not allegorical (because it is the original) there are still many aspects of it that reflect meals throughout literature. This meal is the very epitome of a symbol of community. It is Jesus breaking his body and pouring out his blood for all believers as a symbol of communion in him and community with each other. But other than that, the meal went kind of poorly. In a Bible study I was doing over the Biblical allusions in the Lord of the Rings, our pastor said, "If a person leaves before the meal is over, that should make you immediately think: HE IS THE BAD GUY." He said that since a meal represents trust and community, someone leaving in the middle of it should be a clear sign that he is betraying that trust and community, and it should let the reader know that something bad is about to happen. My mind jumped straight to the Last Supper. In the account of the Last Supper found in John 13, Jesus says, "One of you is going to betray me. It is the one to whom I will give this piece of bread when I have dipped it in the dish." He dips the piece of bread and gives it to Judas Iscariot. Satan possesses Judas, and Judas gets up and leaves the meal. Not only did he leave in the middle of the meal, he left before the most important part of the meal, the most defining moment of the Last Supper, the breaking of the bread, and the drinking of the cup. That is the very part of the meal that demonstrated the community they had with Jesus, and Judas leaving before that showed that he was not part of that community. It also foreshadowed the moment when Judas would betray Jesus to his death later that evening.

Other meals in literature, like the awkward, stuffy and tense meal at the beginning of the Great Gatsby with Daisy, Tom, and Nick, can symbolize this dysfunction of relationships. Since eating is such a personal matter, it reveals personal things about its participants.